2011 was an interesting year, needless to say. It had its ups, its downs, but overall, I have to look at it and say that I came through the rain and am dealing better with life than I was a year ago at this time.
Last year, I said maybe 2011 would be the year that changes everything. It wasn't quite that, but a lot of things did change.
I made good on my goals of joining the gym, finding a decent job (although it's not in Barcelona or Valencia, and grad school still looms on the horizon). Social anxiety (fobia social) is mending slowly but surely. Not entirely over anxiety and depression, but they're also on the mend. I made it to the remaining comunidades autonomas that I hadn't been to. I am conversational in "catalavalenciano". Most importantly, I picked myself up after the disaster that was 2010.
Before I look at the future, I want to look at the past, the year that was 2011.
January started out returning to Valencia after an emotional breakdown in Bilbao. January was quite horrible since the Comunitat Valenciana was unable to pay me whilst certain presidentes de la Comunitat and "closeted" lesbian mayors were galavanting in Italia in New Suits. I went to Peñíscola with the school.
31 January, I joined the gym. A week later, 7 February, I tried Body Combat for the first time and was immediately hooked. These two decisions changed my life. Although sometimes I overdo it STILL at the gym nearly a year later, for the most part it has given me more confidence and boosted the self-esteem.
Vacations/Holidays. Daytrip to Teruel and Segorbe when I missed the bus back to Valencia. Barcelona first weekend in March, last weekend in May and last weekend in December. Madrid, Murcia and Alicante/Calpe for Semana Santa (where I had another breakdown in Madrid, grrr), daytrips to Xátiva, Cullera and Morella. Month in Jerez de la Frontera. Move back to Madrid, trips to León/Asturias, Almería/Granada, back "home" to Valencia and Girona/Barcelona.
I applied and was admitted to the Universitat Autònoma de Barcelona to do a máster de "llengua espanyola" (I mean, a master in Spanish is only good if the title is in catalán, right?). I didn't have the 500€ when needed, didn't get the scholarship, got a call from a place in Madrid, had to take it. Valencia continually screwed me over with visa issues, and I was technically illegal from 1 June until 4 November. I am still waiting for my letter to come so I can pick up my official card so I don't have to have bazillions of copies of paperwork 24/7.
Writing wise...not where I want to be, but 2012 is going to change that. Less time on Facebook and Twitter, more time on Livejournal and writing.
Then there were two television shows (and a returning one) that dominated my entertainment. How I Met Your Mother in February/March, Buffy in June and August-November, and my beloved True Blood from June-September.
What does 2012 have in store for me? That remains to be seen, but seeing that we survive the Zombie Apopcalpyse on 21, here are the goals I would like to be discussing that I have accomplished next year in this entry.
1. Not hear Beyonce for the entire year (and continue without having heard Justin Beiber, ever.) Beyonce causes panic attacks and/or depressive states. It is best not to be exposed to her music. Also, I would like to note that perhaps the Maya prediction is more about her giving birth in 2012. End of the world? We'll see!
2. Find a boyfriend. I still have issues that I'm working on, but who doesn't? I want to meet someone to settle down with. I also want to expand my social circle, go out more, spend less time on the internet.
3. Come out to my mother. Every year, I'm more and more okay with being gay. I think last year was when I finally truly accepted myself as gay and started to love myself as a gay man. It only took 29 years. Now, especially if #2 happens, I don't want to have to hide this aspect to myself.
4. Eat healthy. Again, say this every year. I want to give up Starbucks (I'm here right now), re-give up soda/pop/fizzy drinks/etc like I did from Feb 2006-Sept 2008 and again from Feb 2011-July 2011. I hope to maintain 68 kg/150 pounds throughout the year and add a bit of muscle tone.
5. Read Don Quijote in Spanish and do more time reading.
6. Read the Bible every day. I am no longer sure I believe in God. However, I'd rather have the hope that comes from believing and be wrong. Like Fox Mulder says, I want to believe. I like attempting the Read the Bible in a Year. I more or less accomplished it last year, but from July-December it was more like skim 3 weeks at a time. We'll see how this year goes on the Chronological plan.
7. Get my first novel published and finish my third novel. I also want to do the research and get well into my second novel (the alternate history of Spain.) I vow to write an hour a day. Not sure where I'll find the time for this.
8. Do more hiking. This will prepare me for the major goal of the year....
9. CAMINO DE SANTIAGO. July. I need to do research into this. I want to walk from San Sebastian to Bilbao, and then the last 100 kilometres to Santiago. I also want to go to Finesterra, or however it's spelled. (Gallego sadly lacks me.)
10. Snowboard. Again, every year. Still yet to try it.
11. Go to Greece, Morocco, Ireland and/or Italia.
12. Get back into films and music. Did 2011 even have any music outside Lady Gaga and Rolling in the Deep? Any films outside Scream 4, La piel que habito and Pa negre?
Here's hoping 2012 takes 2011, a "not too shabby" year, and improves upon it.
Tuesday, January 3, 2012
Monday, January 2, 2012
el meu Catalunya
First entry of 2012. The entry with my goals and review of 2011 will have to wait until tomorrow or Wednesday, and the 2011 Awards will be broadcasted "live" from "Barcelona" on Friday.
In 2009, when I went to Barcelona with my "guiri with a Spanish soul" soulmate Ashley, I decided that since I had a pitstop in Barcelona on the way to Italia in 2008, that it would become my tradition to go to BCN during the holidays. Although last year in Bilbao (during my nervous breakdown even) was fun, it broke the tradition. This year, the broken tradition is the calendario de bomberos (firefighters), I mean, guide to the months in catalán or euskera and motivation for the gym, as I couldn't find any anywhere. I digress.
dilluns, 26 desembre. After returning to Body Combat after various weeks off due to "farangitis", I took the night train to Girona, the capital city of the province between Barcelona and France. I watched the film Friends with Benefits before trying to sleep, and the film was actually good, despite my inexplicable dislike of Justin Timberlake. (Let's keep him busy as an actor, folks). I couldn't really sleep, as the train was freezing despite being first class. When the train made a stop for 15 minutes in Barcelona Sants at 7.45 in the morning, I got so excited. I feel a pull toward Catalunya, Barcelona in particular. The train rolled on to its destination.
dimarts, 27 desembre. I found my hostal, above a cutre bar in the heart of the casco antiguo, close to the river. Ei, for 20 Euros a night in Catalunya...you get what you pay for. I dropped off my stuff and went exploring. The excitement came when I found out that I could hold a conversation in catalán (or valenciano de Catalunya, as I like to call it.) I got a cafe amb llet at a bar with a cute camarero, then found the tourist information place for a map. I told the woman I was learning catalán, so she explained everything to me in catalán, and I understood it. I remember in 2003 how excited each insignificant accomplishment I made in Spanish made me. I felt the same this time. I went to the muralla, or wall, around the city, the cathedral, and walked around. I had a plato combinado for lunch, took a nice, long siesta, then went back to the muralla for sunset. I learn that I left my charger at home in Madrid, so no laptop or ability to upload photos as they happen for me! I went to bed early that night, determined not to have a relapse of farangitis!
dimecres, 28 desembre. I woke up, had a quick breakfast, and took off to Cadaqués. I didn't realise the bus station actually had an office, but he let me buy the ticket on the bus, thankfully. 9,85€ and one hour 45 minutes later, I reached Cadaqués, the pueblo where Picasso and Dalí painted to their heart's content, and my fuzzy memory of Little Ashes says García Lorca and/or Buñuel were too. The pueblo is like any other in Spain, but walk a kilometro and you have some of the most amazing views in all of Spain. It is a place I will return one day with my future boyfriend/husband. I had lunch, then caught the bus to Figueres, which, as everyone told me, is nothing but the too expensive museum of Dalí. It's his hometown. I returned to Girona, walk around some more, falling in love with the city and loving the catalán heard in every corner.
dijous, 29 desembre. I wake up early again, check out and catch the bus to Besalú, a charming medieval pueblo in the foothills of the Pyranees. (Piraneo. I don't know how it's written in English as they use the French. Stupid French.) Besalú has an amazing bridge, and it's out in the nature. Oh, if I had time to just walk around there for a few days. I'm definitely inspired to do the Camino de Santiago this summer. I return to Girona, have lunch and catch the train to Barcelona!!! As much as I love catalán, it was a relief to hear my beloved castellano in the streets again. Barcelona has the same vibe that my beloved Valencia does. It's hard to explain. I immediately head to Ramblas del mar to catch the sunset, buy my bus ticket back to Madrid *sob* and grab dinner at my fave vegetarian place. (I'm far from vegetarian, but I love this restaurant!) I rest a bit, then make a much needed pilgramage to the first gay disco I ever went to in 2003. ARENA. I danced, and I had the cojones to say "hola" to the cute boy I had been eyeing all night. He said hola back. Turns out he's Basque, from a pueblo near Bilbao. We talk and dance (and kiss) most of the night, and I walk him back to his hostal where we exchange Facebooks. Sadly...I can't find him, and I'm hoping that it's just that he can't find me. Do all my romances have to end like this?
divendres 30 desembre. I wake up late, and I go to the Museu d'historia de Catalunya, which was fascinating. The geek in me loved the map of "Països Catalans" with all the 93723 dialects. Surprisingly, with a year in Valencia and a professora de Girona, I understand the catalán from Barcelona the best. Lunch, shopping, a walk on the beach at sunset, then cafe amb llet at my fave café in la Barceloneta, then I went to a fiesta with the Queer Barcelona group on Couchsurfing. My shyness was in full effect, but I had fun. I'm a bit perturbed as they never got back to me with the information for the New Year's Eve fiesta. This is where I definitely picked up on the Valencia vibes.
dissabte, 31 desembre: Last day of the year. My friend had to cancel plans last minute. Grr. I went to Montjuic, which I love. Took some time to rest, but I still did a lot of walking. I went to Plaça de Catalunya to eat the grapes, then to have a drink at Punto BCN, then went home to dream of a happier 2012, a year where my writing career takes off, and I find love.
diumenge, 1 gener. I went to Parc Güell, which is the park that has all of Gaudi's houses and designs. So beautiful. Then an early lunch, some time at the beach...and then...no. no. no. no. no. I have to catch the bus to Madrid.
This was one of the better holidays I've had in Spain, right up there with Semana Santa 2010 in País vasco and Asturias Oct 2011.
I think Barcelona is calling me......
In 2009, when I went to Barcelona with my "guiri with a Spanish soul" soulmate Ashley, I decided that since I had a pitstop in Barcelona on the way to Italia in 2008, that it would become my tradition to go to BCN during the holidays. Although last year in Bilbao (during my nervous breakdown even) was fun, it broke the tradition. This year, the broken tradition is the calendario de bomberos (firefighters), I mean, guide to the months in catalán or euskera and motivation for the gym, as I couldn't find any anywhere. I digress.
dilluns, 26 desembre. After returning to Body Combat after various weeks off due to "farangitis", I took the night train to Girona, the capital city of the province between Barcelona and France. I watched the film Friends with Benefits before trying to sleep, and the film was actually good, despite my inexplicable dislike of Justin Timberlake. (Let's keep him busy as an actor, folks). I couldn't really sleep, as the train was freezing despite being first class. When the train made a stop for 15 minutes in Barcelona Sants at 7.45 in the morning, I got so excited. I feel a pull toward Catalunya, Barcelona in particular. The train rolled on to its destination.
dimarts, 27 desembre. I found my hostal, above a cutre bar in the heart of the casco antiguo, close to the river. Ei, for 20 Euros a night in Catalunya...you get what you pay for. I dropped off my stuff and went exploring. The excitement came when I found out that I could hold a conversation in catalán (or valenciano de Catalunya, as I like to call it.) I got a cafe amb llet at a bar with a cute camarero, then found the tourist information place for a map. I told the woman I was learning catalán, so she explained everything to me in catalán, and I understood it. I remember in 2003 how excited each insignificant accomplishment I made in Spanish made me. I felt the same this time. I went to the muralla, or wall, around the city, the cathedral, and walked around. I had a plato combinado for lunch, took a nice, long siesta, then went back to the muralla for sunset. I learn that I left my charger at home in Madrid, so no laptop or ability to upload photos as they happen for me! I went to bed early that night, determined not to have a relapse of farangitis!
dimecres, 28 desembre. I woke up, had a quick breakfast, and took off to Cadaqués. I didn't realise the bus station actually had an office, but he let me buy the ticket on the bus, thankfully. 9,85€ and one hour 45 minutes later, I reached Cadaqués, the pueblo where Picasso and Dalí painted to their heart's content, and my fuzzy memory of Little Ashes says García Lorca and/or Buñuel were too. The pueblo is like any other in Spain, but walk a kilometro and you have some of the most amazing views in all of Spain. It is a place I will return one day with my future boyfriend/husband. I had lunch, then caught the bus to Figueres, which, as everyone told me, is nothing but the too expensive museum of Dalí. It's his hometown. I returned to Girona, walk around some more, falling in love with the city and loving the catalán heard in every corner.
dijous, 29 desembre. I wake up early again, check out and catch the bus to Besalú, a charming medieval pueblo in the foothills of the Pyranees. (Piraneo. I don't know how it's written in English as they use the French. Stupid French.) Besalú has an amazing bridge, and it's out in the nature. Oh, if I had time to just walk around there for a few days. I'm definitely inspired to do the Camino de Santiago this summer. I return to Girona, have lunch and catch the train to Barcelona!!! As much as I love catalán, it was a relief to hear my beloved castellano in the streets again. Barcelona has the same vibe that my beloved Valencia does. It's hard to explain. I immediately head to Ramblas del mar to catch the sunset, buy my bus ticket back to Madrid *sob* and grab dinner at my fave vegetarian place. (I'm far from vegetarian, but I love this restaurant!) I rest a bit, then make a much needed pilgramage to the first gay disco I ever went to in 2003. ARENA. I danced, and I had the cojones to say "hola" to the cute boy I had been eyeing all night. He said hola back. Turns out he's Basque, from a pueblo near Bilbao. We talk and dance (and kiss) most of the night, and I walk him back to his hostal where we exchange Facebooks. Sadly...I can't find him, and I'm hoping that it's just that he can't find me. Do all my romances have to end like this?
divendres 30 desembre. I wake up late, and I go to the Museu d'historia de Catalunya, which was fascinating. The geek in me loved the map of "Països Catalans" with all the 93723 dialects. Surprisingly, with a year in Valencia and a professora de Girona, I understand the catalán from Barcelona the best. Lunch, shopping, a walk on the beach at sunset, then cafe amb llet at my fave café in la Barceloneta, then I went to a fiesta with the Queer Barcelona group on Couchsurfing. My shyness was in full effect, but I had fun. I'm a bit perturbed as they never got back to me with the information for the New Year's Eve fiesta. This is where I definitely picked up on the Valencia vibes.
dissabte, 31 desembre: Last day of the year. My friend had to cancel plans last minute. Grr. I went to Montjuic, which I love. Took some time to rest, but I still did a lot of walking. I went to Plaça de Catalunya to eat the grapes, then to have a drink at Punto BCN, then went home to dream of a happier 2012, a year where my writing career takes off, and I find love.
diumenge, 1 gener. I went to Parc Güell, which is the park that has all of Gaudi's houses and designs. So beautiful. Then an early lunch, some time at the beach...and then...no. no. no. no. no. I have to catch the bus to Madrid.
This was one of the better holidays I've had in Spain, right up there with Semana Santa 2010 in País vasco and Asturias Oct 2011.
I think Barcelona is calling me......
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